Unfortunately, we are not perfect. We have billions of people we can blame for our own shortcomings and failures. We do not get endless good times. When disappointment, failure or hopelessness attacks, we need to fight back. Here are some weapons:
How big is this problem, really? Don't sweat it if it is small.
Life is too short. The universe will continue to evolve. In the whole scheme of things in the entire universe, we are almost insignificant, yet we make big deals out of petty stuff.
Be humble.
Remember that if, some day, they discover the center of the universe you will probably not be in it. Even you have to experience failure or loss maybe for a long time but things will eventually change!! You just don't know when. Don't get so low and down that when things start going up again you won't be able to get up. You are not alone though. We will all secretly feel for you.
Discuss with somebody and get it out of your system. Purge.
Hearing yourself talk about difficulties sometimes throws new light on the problem. As well, if you talk about it long enough, you will find you get so bored of hearing yourself saying the same things over and over again that the problem becomes just a silly thing - at times.
Good and bad surprises are natural occurrances!
You will always have some form of life coming at you - good and bad. When you get lemons, learn to make lemonade! Both sunshine and rain helps flowers grow.
If you ask yourself: "Why me?", your honest response should be: "Why not me?"
It's your turn to use the gifts of talents, skills and abilities given to you to confront and solve your problem or issue. Would you wish your situation on anybody else? No. Then you deal with what you get and do it with your head high. Be dignified in doing your best.
Don't take a lot of things personally. View most things from a spectator point of view.
It helps you keep your cool when you distance yourself. It also helps you see things from a different perspective. It might not be as bad as you think. It's not your fault sometimes. Don't accept it and instead leave it with the other person to stew about. It's not being emotionless. It's accepting life the way it is.
Explore your feelings and hurts openly and honestly with yourself. Learn from them.
This is tough. Don't deny your feelings but go with them. Wallow through the misery and come out to the other shore. Next time is easier. Drive to a secluded spot in a large parking lot. Close the windows in your car, turn up the music, and then yell and scream anything and everything until you purge the hurt and other related feelings.
Take responsibility for being the cause and/or effect of disappointments in your life.
Admit your behaviour to yourself honestyl. Temper? Bubbling rage? Ready to blow? Looking for a fight? Can you say: "I got jealous, angry, greedy, vindictive, enraged or whatever and caused something to happen to me."
Change anger into feeling sorry for who/what disappointed you.
Feeling compassion is easier on the system. Forgiveness is for the giver, not the receiver. Letting go is healthy. It stops the formation of acids and toxins that ruin health. Forgiveness gets the person or event out of your head where he/she/it is preventing you from thinking effectively. Why waste your time being angry when the person isn't even there in front of you to receive it?
Negativity will always be there in life. Get used to it. Rise above it.
Sometimes not getting what we want is a stroke of luck! Toxic people can depress us and alter mood but we also have the choice of staying away from them or immunizing ourselves from their harmful effects.
Find something good that can possibly come from what may be the worst of situations or happenstances.
From great loss can come great strength. There is a saying that God doesn't give you more than you can handle. I beg to differ. Sometimes we get more than we can handle. That's the time to get others to help carry the load. About 7 billiion people were provided to you, from which the right one to help you is just waiting for the two of you to meet.
Do a reality check.
Are you just looking for trouble? Do you make silly, stupid, risky, dangerous decisions knowingly? If so, you take chances and not the potential loss. Too bad. That happens to the rest of us too!!
Have a positive attitude.
A little story emphasizes this point. For their birthday, twins were put in an empty room except for a big bucket of manure in the middle. One looked in, gave a scowl and walked away disgusted and mad. The other put on a big smile, started sneaking around, bending and bobbing to peek out of the windows, checking and listening at doors. When their parents entered, the one with the smile said gleefully, "Okay, I know there's a pony around here somewhere!!"
